Year: 2016

Baby name consultant: First baby, a boy–John+[something] or Jude?

sanctanomina Baby name consultant , , , ,

Okay everyone, buckle up — this is a daddy of a consultation! In more ways than one! Yes, it’s really long (twenty-three ideas for this couple! What!) (You’ll see why!), and also, it’s a papa that commissioned me to do this consultation!

Cameron is one of my most loyal and encouraging readers, and I’m delighted today to post this consultation for he and his wife Chelsey, who are expecting their first baby — a boy!

C&C have fully agreed on Jude Alden as an amazing combo that they both love, that has great meaning for them as well — a great, saintly first name and a nod to Chelsey’s dad in the middle.

But what would a consultation be without a dilemma? For this couple, it’s that Cameron’s full name is John Cameron, and his dad’s first name is John as well. Cameron loves the idea of giving his firstborn son the first name John, like he and his dad, and have him go by his middle name. BUT he and Chelsey love Jude Alden. And they can’t figure out a John ___ name they like as much or better.

Cameron writes,

“Since my dad and I are both first borns and both have “John” as our first name, I always thought it’d be really cool to turn that into a tradition should God bless me with a boy first … Jude Alden just hit us in the face one day when we were out and about and we just stopped and knew right away that we loved that name. It is a power hitter name regards to our faith; being one of the apostles, and honors Chelsey’s father for his middle name! 🙂

[I feel like] Jude Alden is the perfect name… for a younger brother. Chelsey would gladly name it for the first born … However, after having that discussion with you a while back regarding Jude in the spotlight, I have heavily considered giving up my “made up tradition of John + something” to replace it with Jude Alden as a first born, thinking that maybe we’ll never get the chance to use the only name we’ve both come up with and loved.

Obviously Jude Alden is the forerunner. It could very possibly happen that when we see our boy, we just know it’s a Jude and that’s that. We are coming to you to help us with our “John Dilemma”.

John is the beloved apostle and I (Cameron) have a dear devotion to him and his connection with Our Lady. I love John for being a very strong solid name, and the thought of tying in another name to that is so exciting. But Jude Alden is stellar… who knows.”

(Cameron calls it a “made up tradition” because he wasn’t actually named John [something] *because* his dad was, it just worked out that way.)

Except for Jude Alden, Cameron and Chelsey have pretty different taste in names. For Cameron,

“I personally am not a big fan of super “secular” sounding names like “Hunter, Derek, Brad, Jordan, etc…” or names along those lines for the MAIN NAME that we would call our child. We have tossed around ideas including a secular name as a middle name (or first, doesn’t matter what order, really) for example, but not the name we could call him. That includes several, obviously, so I wouldn’t write all those out. … I love good solid Catholic names. You know that. Raphael, Gabriel, Paul, John, Jude, Titus, Daniel. Chelsey and I have been thinking about not being TOO obsessive (mainly me) about having a super well known Catholic name, because we love the thoughts of our children being new saints, thus creating a new name for other families using in reverence and honor….if that makes sense.”

(I totally cracked up at this: “Chelsey and I have been thinking about not being TOO obsessive (mainly me) about having a super well known Catholic name”!! 😀 )

Chelsey, on the other hand,

“likes uniqueness… Chelsey likes names that are a little bit more “rare” but still have a good sound to it, if that makes sense … [she doesn’t] like names that are very common, and [she’s] also not a fan of names that can appear boring, e.g. Paul, Bob, Tom, Sam, etc.. Some names [she does] like are killed by the shortened versions e.g. Elijah- Eli.”

Names Cameron likes but Chelsey doesn’t:

Paul (“I’d totally go for John Paul for obvious reasons, JPII!!!“)
Ezekiel
Isaac
Raphael
Samuel
August (“booooo” [John August is Cameron’s favorite combo])
Elijah
Dominic

Name Chelsey likes but Cameron doesn’t:

Ezra

Name they both kind of like:

Ignatius (but Cameron worries that it’s “SUCH a heavy hitter, that it almost seems to be too much“)

Names that are no-go’s:

Garett
Graham

And finally, for reference, some girls’ names they’ve discussed and like:

Lillian
Grace/Gracie
Willow
Haven
Noelle

Alrighty, first off, the idea of John+[something] is just one of those things that can’t be ignored. You know? On the one hand, I want to say that Jude Alden, being the name Cameron and Chelsey both agree on and love, is the perfect option for their little boy. On the other hand, naming traditions can be so meaningful, and given that John+something is Cameron’s name and his dad’s name, as firstborns, I don’t think it’s the kind of thing that they can shelve for now and maybe consider if they ever have a second boy. I think this baby boy here is their one shot at John+something. So that’s kind of a lot of pressure! It might seem like they’re down to “family tradition” (which happens to nicely coincide with Cameron’s particular devotion to St. John the Evangelist and Our Lady, beautiful) vs. “favorite name, and the one we can happily agree on.”

I posted a while ago on whether parents should reserve names for later use at the expense of using them now or vice versa (in that example it was “Felix now at the expense of Felicity later?” but it works perfectly for John+[something] vs. Jude Alden) and two things that came up in the comments seemed really helpful: (1) name this baby as if he/she were your last baby, and (2) in light of that, which name would you be sadder not to ever get to use? If this little boy is the only little boy that C&C are ever blessed with, would they be sadder to not use John as a first name in the tradition of Cameron and his dad, or the handsome and agreed-upon combo Jude Alden? (Cameron actually commented on that post — this is a really hard dilemma for them, which has been hanging over them for a while!) (Also, if you want to get a glimpse of these sweetest expectant parents, click on his username!)

So my main goals (and my hopes for you all in the comments!) is either to come up with a John+ name that will make them both really happy and not feel like they’re settling, or help them realize Jude Alden is *the* answer, and either way not set them up for name regret later. Cameron started emailing me about this dilemma several months ago, and we’ve had quite a long conversation about it — I’ve suggested several (where “several”=”23”) ideas to them, and since none of them have hit quite the right note, I hope you all can come up with something that’s just right (or maybe Jude Alden is meant to be this little boy’s name?). My ideas are:

(1) John Alden, called Jude
This is probably my top option. It has all three of the elements they both want: John, Alden, and Jude. I know it’s an offbeat idea — you all know I totally specialize in offbeat nickname ideas! So I get it if it’s just too crazy for C&C. It’s the kind of choice that they’d really have to be 100% with and just own it — telling people firmly and consistently that yes, his given name is John Alden, and yes, he’s called Jude exclusively.

(2) John Jude Alden, called Jude
The two-middle name option isn’t for everyone, but it’s a tactic often employed when there are a bunch of names that parents can’t choose between.

(3) John Thaddeus, called Jude
This is probably the one that’s closest to my own personal taste. Thaddeus is after St. Jude Thaddeus, and I think his full name is familiar enough to people that if you say his name is John Thaddeus but you’re calling him Jude, people will probably raise eyebrows because it’s an unorthodox way of getting to Jude, but I don’t think they’d be like, “Where the heck do you get Jude from John Thaddeus??” Another nice thing is that with the “J” of John and the “ude” that’s contained within Thaddeus, Jude is almost like a mashup nickname of the first+middle names. Finally, Thaddeus is a style match for Ignatius and Raphael — it’s got loads of Catholic cachet; it’s also super biblical like Chelsey’s Ezra and several of the names Cameron likes. If they were to go with John Thaddeus nicked Jude, they’d have two of their three important elements — John and Jude. It’ll be important to consider whether or not Chelsey’s dad will be upset with not being included in their first son’s name.

(4) John Ignatius
I think it’s really telling that C&C are both considering Ignatius — besides Jude Alden, it’s the only name they listed that they’re both okay with! John Ignatius is an amazing combo. I know that Cameron said he doesn’t like the “main name” their son will be called (sometimes called a “call name” in the naming world) to sound secular, which I totally get. But I suspect that Chelsey might not mind that so much, and perhaps a good compromise between their tastes would be a heavy hitting super duper Catholicky Catholic given name, like John Ignatius, with a friendlier, more accessible nickname/call name, which I think usually sound secular. I don’t think Gus translates as Catholic, for example, even though St. Augustine is such a big deal, and Gus is a natural nickname for it. Does that make sense? Anyway, with that in mind, John Ignatius with a great nickname might be just the thing for this baby. I’ve seen Iggy, Nate, and Nash as nicknames for Ignatius — I don’t think Iggy’s their taste; Nate’s a pretty safe choice — familiar, masculine; and I’m going to guess that Cameron hates Nash and that Chelsey thinks “Huh. Nash is kinda cute.” But I’d let it sit for a while! I wrote a while ago about when Mom and Dad have different tastes and how to deal with that – heavy hitting given names with cooler/friendlier nicknames were one way to go (I blogged about it here: https://sanctanomina.net/2015/01/14/baby-name-consultant-he-likesshe-likes/, and reworked it into a column for CatholicMom here: http://catholicmom.com/2015/04/15/patrick-vs-polycarp/). An easy nickname also helps to deal with Cameron’s concern that Ignatius is “SUCH a heavy hitter, that it almost seems to be too much.”

(5) John Ezra, called Ezra
Most of the time, if I knew Dad really felt strongly about a certain first name, I would unequivocally think the fairest thing would be for Mom to get full rights to the middle name. This situation is a little trickier because their son would actually go by his middle name and C&C will both have to deal with calling him by that name every day for his whole life, so it’s not as easy as picking a mostly hidden middle name. But their tastes are actually not that far off from each other! Cameron’s picks of Ezekiel, Isaac, and Elijah are all style matches for Chelsey’s Ezra, so I feel like it shouldn’t be that much of a thing to scooch closer together, you know? Of course, I also know that’s not really how naming works — you both like what you like and that’s just the way it is. But I’d consider John Ezra. Something Cameron wants, something Chelsey wants. Ezra’s a really cool name I think, and while it doesn’t have the Catholic cachet the names on Cameron’s list have, I think the full “John Ezra” steers it more in that direction. For what it’s worth, I also think John Ezra and Jude Alden are amazing brother names! Similar lengths, and Ezra and Jude sound really cute together.

(6) John Caleb
Caleb is a great name in my opinion, and a great style match for the Old Testament names they both like. It can also take the awesome (imo) nickname Cal, if they wanted to do a nickname. So cute!! But then Chelsey said some names that she might otherwise like are “killed by the shortened versions e.g. Elijah-Eli” – I don’t feel like I have a good handle on what nicknames she would consider dealbreakers (I loved the examples of Paul, Bob, Tom, Sam, etc. – perfect! But I’m less sure about the more uncommon nicknames, like Cal, for example. I was also surprised to see she doesn’t like Eli, as I would probably have thought she would have liked it). I don’t think Caleb needs a nickname, and I don’t think most people would think to shorten it to a nickname. I also like that John Caleb would share initials with Dad – another nice connection.

(7) John Roman
Roman is another one that seems like it might be just perfect. It can be heavy duty Catholicky Catholic, with its ties to (in my mind) the Pope, the Vatican, Roman Catholicism, etc. But I think it can also appeal to those who prefer names that are a little less heavy – there are some celebs that have used the name Roman, for example, like Cate Blanchett, Molly Ringwald, Debra Messing, and Rodney Peete. It’s a style match for Raphael, Dominic, and Noelle, and the similar sounding Ronan is a style match for Haven, all of which I thought was pretty awesome. John Roman is really handsome. (Or John Ronan?)

(8) John Gabriel
Gabriel is a style match for Isaac, Raphael, Samuel, and Elijah, as well as being a great Catholic name – St. Gabriel the Archangel brings to mind Our Lady and the Annunciation, which are beautiful Marian tie-ins for a boy. Gabe is one of the best nicknames imo, and I’ve often thought Gil could totally work too. John Gabriel rocks.

(9) John Kolbe or John Xavier
I wonder what they’d both think of Kolbe? I’m feeling like it might overlap really nicely with both their styles. It can sound trendy, like Colby and Coby and Cody, but it’s St. Maximilian Kolbe all the way. Loads of Catholic families I know have been choosing it for their sons; it’s a great option, and very recognizably Catholic. Kole could also work as a pretty cool nickname. I love John Kolbe.

I’m including Xavier in the same category because it’s a saint’s last name that’s being used as a first name. It’s gotten popular recently, but I still think it comes across as exclusively Catholic. I really like John Xavier.

(10) John Francis
Okay, hear me out – Francis is St. Francis of Assisi, it’s Pope Francis, it’s awesome. But most people I’ve talked about it with don’t care for Francis as a call name, and I’m guessing Frank/Frankie isn’t really C&C’s style. So I wonder what they’d think of the nickname I keep pushing on people for Francis: Finn? One of the things about Catholicky Catholic names is that you might be saddling a child with a name that’s too heavy for them when they’re little, so having nicknames that are easy and friendly, or that fit in with their peers, can sometimes be as much a gift as the Amazing Saint Name you gave them. Does that make sense? So there are going to be a lot of little Finns this year, because of the new Star Wars movie, but he’s a great character, and a little John Francis would happily and easily fit in with his peers if he went by Finn.

(11) John Matthias
Matthias might really work for this baby as well. He’s in the New Testament – he was chosen by the Apostles to replace Judas, so I think Matthias can be considered a really Catholic name, since his selection was the result of an official meeting of the Apostles – one of the first (if not THE first) Church Councils perhaps? In a manner of thinking? It’s got that heavy biblical feel that Ezekiel, Isaac, Samuel, Elijah, Jude, and Ezra have as well, and could shorten to Matt/Matty if you like (one of the objectively coolest people I’ve ever known has a son named Matty, so you know Matty’s a good nickname! Haha!).

(12) John Bryant
In emailing with Cameron I discovered that Bryant’s an important family surname for Chelsey, and I wondered if she’d like to balance Cameron’s family first name pick with her own family middle name pick? Bryant’s a great surname to have in the family mix to have if you’d ever want to consider using it for a child, because it’s so first-namey.

(13) John Michael, John Miles, John Milo
Miles and Milo were my first ideas here—I know you all have seen me suggest them ad nauseam to others on the blog but darn it, I’m going to keep suggesting it til someone uses it! 😀 I love them because they’re Marian! The Irish name Maolmuire, which means “devotee of Mary” has been anglicized as Miles/Myles/Milo! I’ve also seen Miles and Milo offered as offbeat nickname ideas for Michael, so I thought if C&C kind of liked Miles and/or Milo but were still hesitant, maybe John Michael would work for them with the nickname Miles or Milo?

(14) John Connor
The combo John Connor reminded me of John Cardinal O’Connor, the amazing archbishop of the Archdiocese of New York who founded the Sisters of Life—a great association! Connor’s a great name.

(15) John Owen
I’m dying over brothers Owen and Jude, love! And St. Nicholas Owen has been a favorite of mine for a while—he built hiding places for priests in England and was martyred for the faith. And it’s also my newest nephew’s name. 🙂

(16) John Elliott
Elliott has strong connections to the faith—in origin it’s a diminutive of Elias, which is the Greek form of Elijah. I’ve always considered Elijah/Elias/Elliott to be Marian, because the cloud the prophet Elijah saw on the water from Mt Carmel in the book of Kings is said to have represented Our Lady. Indeed the Carmelites trace their history back to Elijah and that incident—they were venerating Our Lady long before she was born. It gives me goosebumps to think about!

(17) John Charles nicked Cal
C&C did actually let me know that they both liked the nickname Cal from my Caleb suggestion, which made me think that maybe Charles was the answer. Cal is a traditional (though somewhat uncommon) nickname for Charles, and Charles is all kinds of awesome—JP2’s birth name was Karol, which is the Polish for Charles; there’s also St. Charles Borromeo and one of my new favorites Bl. Karl of Austria and a bunch of others. This ties in well (I think) with their decision to not be “TOO obsessive about having a super well known Catholic name”—it’s got impeccable credentials but doesn’t hit you in the face with it.

(18) John Leo
Pope St. Leo the Great! It’s also on the rise popularity-wise, having cracked the top 100 or the first time since 1937 in 2014 after rising steadily since 1995, so it’s got appeal beyond the Catholic world.

(19) John Robert nicked Rory or Bo
I suspect that Chelsey’s first reaction to Robert will be “ugh”! But St. Robert Bellarmine is a great saint, so maybe Cameron will like it, and updating the nickname options from Bob(by) or Rob(by) to Rory or Bo might do the trick. Rory is a style match for some other names that are similar to Jude, like Finn. Brothers Rory and Jude would be so cute! And I’m including Bo because my brother and SIL, parents of the Owen I mentioned above, considered Bo as a nickname for their next baby, and Robert was one of the suggestions I gave them for a way to get to it.

(20) John William nicked Will or Liam, or John Liam
William is as solid as they come, and Will and Liam are great nicknames. Liam was actually a style match for Willow, which is what encouraged me to suggest it. There are a whole bunch of Sts. and Bls. William, and one is also known as Bl. Liam Tuiridh.

(21) John Damian/Damien (nicked Danny or Denny?)
Finally, Damian is a style match for Noelle, and of course I immediately thought of St. Damian (of Damian and Cosmas fame) and St. Damien de Veuster (sorry to Chelsey, I have the “uber Catholic name” bug like Cameron! It’s just how my namey mind works!) and wondered what they’d think of them? Damien’s one of those that I’ve tried to convince my hubs of, and he won’t have any of it because of the demon child in the 1970s horror movie The Omen, which I’ve never seen and neither has he, but people do seem to associate that movie with these names. Which just kills me. Although, the popularity of the name has actually increased since that movie came out! Both variants are impeccably saintly, and though neither has traditional nicknames, I’ve often thought Danny (for Damian) and Denny (for Damien) could work.

(22) John Thomas or John Timothy nicked Ty or Trey or Trip(per)
I know Chelsey said she didn’t like Tom, but I was thinking if they use John for this baby, he’ll be the third Murray boy in succession to have John as his first name. So Trey could totally work as a nickname for him, and really it doesn’t matter what his middle name is, they could still use Trey, but I thought a “T” middle name might be the most appealing. Thomas and Timothy were the two I thought might be the best, not having any particular hardcore Catholic feel even though they *are* hardcore Catholic. Then the idea of Timothy reminded me that I’ve seen Ty used as a nickname for it, and I quite liked that too: John Timothy nicked Ty.

Trip(per) is because I know another boy who’s the III and he’s always gone by Tripper, I love it. Totally sounds like an athlete’s nickname, no? (And not to get totally crazy here, but one could possibly think of Trey/Trip(per) as a nod to the Trinity. Oh man.)

(23) John [middle name meaning “beloved” or otherwise referring to St. John] nicknamed Trey, Trip(per) if desired
This is actually a brand-new suggestion for C&C, which I haven’t yet offered. Piggybacking on the previous suggestion and my assertion that C&C can call their baby Trey or Tripper no matter what his middle name is as long as his first name is John, I thought I’d suggest some names that could refer specifically to St. John the Beloved Disciple:

Amatus — means “beloved”
Erasmus, Erastus — mean “beloved”
David — likely meaning “beloved”

Cruz — means “cross,” referring to the Cross of Crucifixion and the fact that St. John the Beloved was there with Him, and that Jesus gave His mother to St. John from the Cross (though I would use the “croos” pronunciation and not the Spain-Spanish “crooth”)

John Amatus, John Erasmus, John Erastus, John David, and John Cruz are all all pretty amazing (I’m loving John Cruz! I actually love it without the Trey/Trip nicknames — Cruz is great!).

Whew! Okay! Those are all my ideas, but I’m dying to hear yours — what would you all suggest for this family torn between John+[something] and Jude Alden? Or any advice?

Birth announcement: Owen Michael!

sanctanomina Birth announcement , ,

I posted a consultation for my brother and sister-in-law back in November, and I’m over-the-moon thrilled to announce that my baby nephew has been born and been given the amazing name of … Owen Michael!

A funny thing is that in my consultation, no mention was made of the name Owen, despite the fact that as long as I’ve known my SIL I’ve known that she loves that name (she herself was actually going to be named Owen if she had been a boy!)—she and my brother didn’t name their first son Owen (we all thought they would) and when it wasn’t included on the list of names she said they were considering for boy #2, I figured it had just kind of faded away, as so many once-favorite names have done for me and for so many of you, I’m sure.

But when little Owen was born and his name was announced, my immediate feeling was Of course! It feels so familiar to me to have a nephew named Owen! I really really love that the longtime favorite, which was thought to have slipped away, found its place in the end.

Congratulations to my brother and SIL and big brother Leo, and happy birthday to my sweet nephew, Baby Owen!!

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Owen Michael

Birth announcement: Zelie and Louis!

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A mama emailed me last fall with questions about the pronunciation of Zelie, as she wanted to name her boy/girl twins after our new Martin saints. She recently wrote to let me know that they arrived and have indeed been named after those great saints: Zelie Marigold Bélanger and Louis Patrick Loughlin!

She writes,

“Hello Kate!

I know this is very belated but I wanted to thank you for giving me peace of mind in our babies’ naming before our big day.

They were born on November 30, 2015. Their names are Zelie Marigold Bélanger and Louis Patrick Loughlin. Zelie rhyming with jelly, and Louis rhyming with gooey. When we would talk about their names before they were born, that is how we pronounced them and I’m so happy that they fit them perfectly. I guess we named them names that can have a bunch of different pronunciations but we are happy with the pronunciations that we picked.

Marigold is their great great grandmother’s name on my husband’s side and a name to honor Our Lady. (In my head, I think of the particular image of the coronation of Mary) And Bélanger is a family last name and the last name of Blessed Dina, who is an ancestor of my husband! Patrick is their great great grandfather’s name of my side and Loughlin is my mother’s maiden name.

We use second middle names in our family to honor and remember family surnames which I feel are so quickly forgotten.

They join their older brothers Fulton Lawrence Keene and Gilbert Gerard O’Hara. Their names are also full of meaning as well! I want when my children to ask me why I named them a particular name to have a story to tell them!

A quick note- You mentioned that accent marks on official forms were not recognized but when we wrote Bélanger down, we figured what’s not to lose if they didn’t add the accent mark for a second middle name. And when her birth certificate came the accent mark was present on the official document!

Thank you again so much! Reading your blog before our twins were born really helped broaden my horizon in how to name and honor family and saints. We need all the saints we can get on our family’s “team,” as I say, so finding ways to add them into our children’s names was fun!“

Can you believe the amazing naminess that’s included in this mama’s note??!! So! Many! Great! Names! And I’m really glad to include the bit about the accent marks — when this mom had asked me about them, I’d said with blustery confidence,

“My personal feeling about accents is that they cause more headaches than are necessary. Official forms in America don’t allow for them, and accents always confuse others as to where the accent goes and what it means.”

I’m really glad to have been proven wrong — how fun that accents are recognized on birth certificates! And I’m glad that the parents ignored me and went ahead with Bélanger — my personal feelings are are totally subjective and fickle, after all. (Despite what I said, I actually love me a good accented name — it always looks so regal!)

Thank you to these proud parents for letting me post such a fun birth announcement!  Congratulations to the whole family (including big brothers Fulton and Gilbert!), and happy birthday Babies Zelie and Louis!!

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Zelie Marigold Bélanger and Louis Patrick Loughlin

Bonus baby name consultation: Arwen’s new little guy!

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You guys! It’s Thursday! And because you’re all so dear to me, I’m delighted to post a bonus consultation for this week!

I am SO EXCITED to do a consultation for Arwen of the blog abc family, formerly known as arwen/elizabeth — she’s been writing online at her blog and at the old Faith and Family Live since 2004 and I’ve been familiar with her most of that time — that’s a long [virtual, one-sided] relationship y’all! 😀 She’s expecting her fifth baby, and her fourth boy!

I think she might have been the first person I knew of who actually used Blaise for her actual son (rather than just listing it on fantasy baby name lists), and I remember getting all swoony and twinkly-eyed over his name when I first read her older two’s names (it’s been a lifelong affliction, my love of names).

And then the Catholic internets were all atwitter when she was expecting twins — little boys who will be five next month and I.can’t.believe. it’s been that long. !!

Here are her amazingly named older children:

Camilla Claire
Blaise Alexander
Linus Michael
Ambrose John

Camilla is just lovely, Blaise is awesome, and Linus and Ambrose! Like Blaise, I hadn’t ever heard of Linus on a real-life boy, and the only other Ambrose I knew of was Danielle Bean’s — Arwen’s naming was a revelation for me! I love her taste so much that I blogged about her a year ago, and on another occasion linked to this post she did on the naming of her two oldest (and discovered that her parents had equally amazing taste, as shown in this post written by her mom). ((sighs of happiness all around))

I see Arwen mostly on Twitter and Instagram now, and it was on Twitter that I saw her ask, all casual-like:

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As if such a tweet wouldn’t make me start hyperventilating with excitement. So I tweeted back in a really restrained and professional manner, and she responded (!):

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Which of course you know totally made my day (as did this little response to Arwen’s request, from our Mrs. Patton, no big deal:

arwen_tweet3-04.07.16

 

 

 

 

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Arwen’s currently on modified bed rest because of contractions that are too strong too soon, but she says she’s cautiously optimistic that she can make it to term (she’s 25 weeks now), which makes me extra happy to post this consultation for her because they’re such fun, aren’t they? A great distraction for a pregnant mama. ❤

I asked her about her naming hopes and dreams, and she wrote,

“Okay, so our last name is Mosher (you probably know that) and is pronounced MOE-zhur … I am not at ALL worried about middle names — those are easy for me and I have no attachment to any particular ones. I just pick a saint name that flows with the first name (and you’ve probably noticed that for our boys we’ve used very common middle names to sort of “balance” the unusual first names) and Bryan cares not at all about middle names, so I’m confident that if we find the right first name we’ll be set.

We actually have ZERO boy names on the list so far — Linus and Ambrose were left over from naming Blaise, and they made such an obvious (to us) set of twin names that we used them both and now we’re out.

Here are our basic naming requirements/preferences:

1) It must be a saint name. (Requirement)

2) It would be nice to have an early saint, since all our other boys are named after early saints. (Mild preference)

3) It should be roughly the same popularity/commonness level as our other boys’ names, which I don’t define by any particular number on the SSA charts but by a general familiarity level: I like that almost everyone has *heard* of our boys’ names, but doesn’t usually know more than one other person with the name. (Non-Catholics don’t tend to know anyone, but we know another family with a Blaise, one with an Ambrose, and one with a Linus.) (Strong preference)

4) It should not start with C, B, L, or A, since I would like our kids to have their own first initials. (Fairly strong preference, but I would forgo this one for the perfect name)

5) The name should be reasonably intuitive to pronounce based on its spelling. Even though our boys’ names are unusual, I think we achieved this with them; Camilla’s name gets mispronounced more often than all of theirs put together. This is the main reason why I’ve never put the name Mathias/Matthias on our list even though I like it and it’s a style match — I feel like it’s not obvious whether it’s pronounced with a hard T or a TH sound and that bothers me. (Fairly strong preference)

We have no family names or favorite saints in mind, and I can’t think of any other similar names that we’ve ruled out for reasons not on this list. The only thing I can think of is that a couple people have suggested Pascal, which I rejected immediately because I can’t have brothers named Blaise and Pascal — too much. But as long as there’s not something obvious like that, no problem.

I hope this gives you a good place to start! I am due July 16th but tend to go early, so I’m hoping for birth no earlier than mid-June but would like to have the name nailed down before that … We tend to be kind of aggressive about hunting down names, but this is the first time we’ve been at a total loss for ideas, so I’m guessing it will take us longer than normal.”

As you all know, I love rules! Not only does it make for a really fun challenge, but it gives me a really good, really clear idea of what the parents are looking for. I especially really liked Arwen’s idea about popularity/commonness—a fact that she doesn’t “define by any particular number on the SSA charts but by a general familiarity level”—I feel like that’s something I can bring to the table that the Baby Name Wizard can’t, for example. The BNW‘s always really helpful, but a bit less so in cases like this one, because it relies heavily on SSA stats and tends to have little sense of Catholicky Catholic naming trends. (For example, Kateri’s always the one that comes to mind for me—in the BNW all the style matches are Native American names! While all the Kateris I know of in real life — a good few! — have siblings like Leo, Jude, Xavier, Regina, Rosemary, and Jane.)

So I should back up and explain for any new readers, I almost always start a consultation by looking up in the Baby Name Wizard the names the parents have already used and the ones they like as it lists, for each entry, boy and girl names that are similar in terms of style/feel/popularity. I did start here with the BNW, but I also rifled through my mental files and info I’ve learned on the blog and came up with seven *amazing* ideas! 😀 I should also mention that I didn’t look at the suggestions from Arwen’s Twitter followers on purpose — I wanted to have a clear, open mind when working on this for her. But it’s quite likely I’m repeating ideas others have mentioned, so — kudos to you all!

(1) Joachim (d. first century or earlier)f
Okay, if Arwen and Bryan hate this idea I get it—I’ve been pushing Joachim on people forever, including my own husband, and nobody’s yet bitten! But he’s definitely an early saint (though if they think he feels too recent, I understand that too, since I don’t think devotion to St. Joachim arose until around 1000?), and I think most Catholics are familiar with the name, although—and this is probably the other reason they might hate it, a la Mat(t)hias—a lot of people don’t know how to pronounce it. I’ve always heard it said JO-ah-kim, and it seems that’s the basic English pronunciation, and all other pronunciations are foreign or influenced by non-English speakers. So there’s that. If I could ever convince my hubs, we’d use the nickname Jake, which totally makes it user friendly.

(2) Justin (d. 165)
I love love love Justin for this family. St. Justin Martyr! He’s totally the right time period, the right first initial, and everyone knows the name even though not many babies are being named it currently. That being said, Monday’s consultation was for the little sister of a Justin! For Justin Martyr! And I love seeing it! But if Arwen and Bryan think it’s too time-stamped, I get it. Boo. 😦

(3) Damian (d. 303) or Damien (d. 1889)
Sts. Damian and Cosmas are also the right time period for what they’re looking for, and I’ve long loved the name Damian. The spelling Damien loses the time period, as St. Damien de Veuster becomes the patron (unless they just want to think of it as a variant of St. Damian, and that’s cool and legit too), but Damien is the French spelling, which really goes along with Camilla and Blaise. Unfortunately, they’ll definitely want to be sure they weigh whether or not The Omen connection is too much though (my hubs won’t consider because of that movie, which is like 40 years old and he’s never seen!).

(4) Ignatius (d. 107)
I’m really feeling Ignatius for this baby. St. Ignatius of Antioch is the right time period; I think the pronunciation is fairly intuitive; he’s known by Catholics but the name’s not used a whole lot; and I love the nickname options of Iggy, Nate, and Nash. Also Cate Blanchett named one of her sons Ignatius! That’s pretty cool.

(5) Thaddeus (d. first century or 1653)
Linus is the only of the other Mosher kiddos to have a biblical name, so I kind of like adding another one in. Thaddeus is familiar and I think Jude’s used more than Thaddeus among Catholic (and non-Catholic) families, so they’d get the benefit of a popular and beloved saint without the popular-name baggage. They could also look to later holy Thaddeuses—I particularly love Bl. Thaddeus Moriarty, an Irish Dominican martyr.

(6) Sebastian (d. 288)
I’m guessing this might be too popular for Arwen and Bryan—a lot of Catholic parents love Sebastian! But for good reason! My boys looooove the pics of him with the arrows sticking out of him, and even my grown-up brother loves that he’s the patron saint of athletes. Seb(by) and Bash are really cute nicknames.

(7) Raphael (Old Testament)
Raphael’s another of those names that’s really known but not used too much. I guess there’s a pronunciation issue as well—I prefer RAY-fee-ul, but most people I personally know say rah-fay-EL (I’d be interested in how you all say it — am I in a weird pronunciation pocket? Or is rah-fay-EL pretty standard?). Otherwise, I think it would be so great for this baby!

(8) Clement (d. ~88)
Finally, Clement, and I know I’m totally breaking one of Arwen’s rules here (no repeating initials), but you all know I’ve been loving and pushing the Mercy names since it’s the Year of Mercy and Clement means merciful and it would be so meaningful for a baby born this Jubilee Year! He was also the same time period as Arwen’s other boys, and is papal like Linus!  (Also, as a related option, I’m totally loving the combo Justin Clement. Just sayin. 🙂 )

And those are my ideas for Little Mr. Mosher! What do you all think? What would you suggest as a little brother to Camilla, Blaise, Linus, and Ambrose that follows all (or most) of the rules?

Name signs for those who use American Sign Language

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Our reader Amy is deaf, and was recently sharing with me how name signs are bestowed, which I thought you’d all find as interesting as I do:

“In regards to naming practices for people who use American Sign Language*:

Culturally, a name sign should only be given to you by a Deaf person (you can’t just make up your own) and they are also not always bestowed right away. Sometimes it can takes months or longer while you wait for the right one to come along. Until then, names are typically just finger spelled. Sometimes short names (2 or 3 letters) are only finger spelled and that motion becomes their sign. But for the most part name signs are given based on a characteristic unique that person. Like Callie might walk with a specific sway in her hips, so hers might be a C hand shape near her hip that rocks back and forth. Rachel might be a person that is always happy and smiling so the sign for smile is done with the handshape for the letter R instead of the regular hand shape. Gavin might be a G on his upper arm because he is strong.

The first initial is not always used. I know an Anna who had chubby cheeks as a baby so her name sign is a finger flick on her cheek. Caleb might be a claw hand shape, finger tips almost tapping his chin. My co-worker Jill’s sign name is the same as the sign for flower because it relates to her maiden name. I have a friend who didn’t “name” her son until he was almost one, and then he was “named” after an eyebrow raise he would always do. The hand shape/movement mimics it.

In my own family we use the letters MK for my son Martin Kane, as a way of including his formal first name, even though we call him Kane. Also because we already use a K hand shape for my daughter Kristy (palm facing in, rising up from her ear because she would always make high squeaky sounds and she is hearing). My name (Amy) is just finger spelled, My husband Marty’s is an M making an arch down like the sign for kung fu because he is a black sash, an instructor and it’s where we met. Sometimes just generic signs are used. A good example of this might be when reading a story book. Instead of spelling the characters names over and over again or coming up with a characteristic name sign, you could just simply shake the first letter in the air or tap it on your jaw if the character is female, or on your temple if they are male (because this is where female/male signs are made). Fun stuff huh! Although, working in a deaf school, sometimes it gets confusing when students have the same name sign or ones very similar. But then again, regular school kids have this same problem. Common top 10 names usually end up going by their first name plus their last name initial. Emily C. or Emily K.?

*some names in this post have been changed to protect privacy“

So interesting, right? I always wondered how people got their name signs! I took Sign Language classes for years before and during college, which were taught by a hearing interpreter, so she knew a lot but she wasn’t deaf (I don’t know how much “insider” cultural info she had) and I didn’t know to ask about this (we all finger spelled our names) — this is all new to me!

I also really like how the name signs are tied to a characteristic that is particular to each individual, and how it “Sometimes it can takes months or longer while you wait for the right one to come along. ” It feels really affectionate to me because it requires observation of the person — you have to really *know* him or her.

Amy also told me, which I hadn’t known, that St. Francis de Sales is the patron of the deaf — such a cool thing to know! I love him! (He’s also a patron of writers, and I’ve long asked him for intercession for my writing efforts.) I looked him up, just to see if I could find an explanation for this particular patronage, and found this amazing tidbit:

“His simple, clear explanations of Catholic doctrine, and his gentle way with everyone, brought many back to the Roman Church. He even used sign language in order to bring the message to the deaf, leading to his patronage of deaf people.”

That.is.awesome. ❤

Do any of you know anyone with a name sign, and if so, what is it/how did they get it?

Thanks to Amy for writing this up for us!!

Names for the Joyful Mysteries

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Yesterday was one of my very favorite feast days and the first of the Joyful Mysteries, which makes today the perfect Tuesday to post names associated with them! And also, Dwija’s little Helen was discharged from the NICU yesterday and is home with her family, happy and thriving. Joy all around!!

Today’s post is a continuation of my Mysteries of the Rosary series, having already done names for the Sorrowful and Glorious Mysteries, and your comments have been invaluable — keep them coming!

These are the Joyful Mysteries (read more here) (and here’s how to pray the Rosary):

The Annunciation by Gabriel to Mary (yesterday’s feast!)
The Visitation of Mary to Her Cousin Elizabeth
The Nativity of Jesus
The Presentation of the Baby Jesus in the Temple
The Finding of the Child Jesus in the Temple

Names associated with the Joyful Mysteries might include:

Girls

Angela, Angeline, Angelica, Archangela, Angel — the angel names all point to St. Gabriel

Annunziata — an Italian name referring to the Annunciation

Annunciación — a Spanish name referring to the Annunciation

Christina, Christine, Christiane/a, Kristin, etc. — the Christ- names refer to Jesus in the last three Mysteries

Elizabeth, Elizabeth, Elise, Elisa, Eliza, etc. — for St. Elizabeth, Our Lady’s cousin

Emmanuelle, Emmanuella — for Jesus, especially in the Nativity

Felicity, Felicitas — means “happiness,” for the Joyful Mysteries

Fiat — for Our Lady’s agreement to what Gabriel announced (“let it be done”); Amy suggested Fiat recently, and suggested the particular first name-middle name combo Marian Fiat

Gabrielle, Gabriela — for St. Gabriel

Jane, Joan, Jo(h)anna — for St. John the Baptist, who leapt in his mother’s womb for joy at being in the presence of his Unborn Savior

Josephine, Josefa — for good St. Joseph

Joy, Gioia — means “joy” in English and Italian, respectively

Joyce — behindthename says it originally came from a name meaning “lord,” and that its more recent popularity may be related to its similarity to the Middle English word for “to rejoice.” “Lord” or “rejoicing” — it’s all good for a Joyful Mysteries name!

Mary, Maria, Marie, etc. — for Our Lady, of course

Natalie, Natalia — literally refers to Christmas Day

Noel, Noelle — French for “Christmas”

Presentación — a Spanish name referring to the Presentation

Seraphina, Serafina, Seraphine — refers to the angels (specifically the seraphim, but I think the angelic meaning is what most people think of)

 

 

Boys

Angelo, Angel — see the Angel names above

Annunziato — see Annunziata above

Baptista, Baptiste, Battista, Bautista — alone or in combination with a John name, for St. John the Baptist (these are all listed as masculine by behindthename, but they could easily be used for girls as well, as I don’t think they come across as masculine [or at least not exclusively so] in America)

Christian, Christopher — see the Christ- names above

Emmanuel — see Emmanuelle above

Felix — see Felicity above

Gabriel — of course!

Jesús — it’s not considered reverent to use the name of Jesus in English, but it is in Spanish

John — for St. John the Baptist

Joseph — see Josephine above

Noel — see Noel above

Ryan — means “little king,” which especially calls to mind the Baby Jesus

Seraphim — see Seraphina above

What others can you add to this list? (There are lots more Christmas names, which I’ve posted about a few times — I just included the ones here that seemed particular to what I think of when I’m meditating on the Mystery of the Nativity.)

+ My soul proclaims the greatness of the Lord; my spirit rejoices in God my Savior. +

Baby name consultant: Little sister for Justin

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Kara and her husband are expecting their second baby, a little girl! Their older son is:

Justin Michael

Because, as Kara writes,

“Our little boy is Justin Michael, Justin because we both love St. Justin Martyr and Michael because it is my husband’s middle name and I love the angels :)”

I can’t tell you how much I love that St. Justin Martyr was the inspiration here! I think his name definitely needs more use.

Kara had originally emailed me before they knew they were having a girl, and had said,

“[My husband] is a cradle catholic and I am a recent convert, so we really want to name our children with saint names or Marian names … So far the names I have picked are Charles (to be called Charlie) Gabriel and Eloise Marie. I tend to like more unorthodox, old fashioned and elegant names, and my husband is very, very traditional.”

I included this bit for further info regarding their taste in names (Charles Gabriel, love!). After they found out they were having a girl Kara wrote again,

“Just got the ultrasound results and it’s a girl! My husband and I both agree on Regina and Eloise but we are still unsure. Not sure what kind of middle name would go with Regina, and our last name ends in an a so the middle name needs to be substantial (lol). I also love Avonlea, Ava for short, but my husband is wavering. He really dislikes anything totally out of the ordinary. He likes Alexandra and Alexis but I don’t like either one … We would both really like a Marian component and possibly a saint as well.”

Okay, so first off, I love Eloise Marie, just lovely. It’s fairly uncommon but familiar, and has sweet nickname potential in Ellie.

Their new idea of Regina is a great one! Like Eloise it’s pretty uncommon these days (even more so than Eloise), and very Marian, which is always my favorite! I think Regina Marie is a fine first name-middle name combo. Regina Caeli is another idea they might like — it means Queen of Heaven in Latin, and I’ve seen that full combo used as a first name/middle name set, as well as just Caeli as a first name — you can pronounce it KAY-lee or CHAY-lee as you like. Some other middle name ideas I had to go with Regina were Therese, Rose, and Bernadette — I like Regina Rose, Regina Therese, and Regina Bernadette very much — lots of faith significance in each one. The full Regina is lovely, but if they wanted a nickname, I know Gina is traditional and obvious, but I’ve also thought Ree, Ria, Rina, and the tomboyish Reggie could also work.

Also, this mom recently named her daughter Sylvie Regina, which Kara and her hubs also might like — it sounds like the name of the Marian hymn “Salve Regina,” and Sylvie is the French variant of Sylvia, which Eloise makes me think of. I love Sylvie!

Avonlea! What a fun name! And the nickname Ava is beautiful. I wonder what Kara and her hubs would think of the name Avila? It’s so similar in sound to Avonlea, and it’s also a place name, and can also take the nickname Ava, but it’s super saintly as it refers to St. Teresa of Avila. I’m also thinking of a mom I know who named her daughter Ava Maria, because it sounds like Ave Maria, so that’s an idea too.

As for Kara’s hubs’ favorites, Alexandra and Alexis are both sweet and feminine, and I have some ideas below that might suit his taste while still being a name Kara likes.

Okay! So here are my other ideas for this Little Miss:

(1) Genevieve or Evangeline
I’m including these two together because I think of them as being so similar — both with a heavy V presence; both long and sophisticated; both can take the super adorable nicknames Evie or Vivi. St. Genevieve is the patron of Paris, and was influenced by their idea of Eloise; Evangeline refers to the Gospel writers (the Evangelists) and was influenced by Avonlea (it was listed as a style match in the Baby Name Wizard, which, as you all know, lists, for each entry, boy and girl names that are similar in terms of style/feel/popularity). I love them both for Kara and her hubs, and I don’t know which one I would suggest more than the other! The fact that they both have those V’s in them reminded me of Avonlea, and the nicknames Evie and Vivi are similar in sound to Ava.

(2) Victoria nicknamed Cora
Victoria was listed as a style match for Alexandra, and as soon as I saw it I thought it might be just the name to bridge Kara’s name taste and her husband’s. It peaked in the 90’s, like Alexandra and Alexis, but like them it’s so sophisticated and feminine that I think of it as timeless. It means “victory,” which I associate with Jesus, and for an extra faith-y connection, Charlotte @ To Harriet Louise recently said she liked the nickname Cora for Victoria, which I thought was so amazing, and we’re talked a bit about Cora being used recently in honor of the Sacred Heart of Jesus (here, including in the comments; cor means “heart” in Latin).

(3) K/Catherine
Originally I had Catherine on my list, for St. Catherine of Siena — Catherine is the French spelling of the name, which Eloise made me think of — but then I was thinking about Kara’s name, and her husband’s like of Alexandra, and it all made me think of how I’ve seen St. Katherine of Alexandria spelled with a K most often (though sometimes with a C), and that made me think — maybe Katherine Alexandr(i)a as a full name would appeal to them both? It could be seen as a subtle nod to Kara –sharing of initials and some other letters — and I think Kate is one of the greatest nicknames ever — spunky and sweet at once. (And I’m not just saying that because Katherine/Kate is my name! 😀 )

(4) Christiana
Another name that was a style match for Alexandra/Alexis was Christina, which does have a bit of a dated feel I think (though also timeless), but I’ve always loved the Christ- names, being that they’re Jesus names, so I thought maybe an updated version would suit Kara and her hubs. Christiana’s my favorite of them — I love its international feel, and the fact that it’s not as common as the other (also lovely, but well used) variants like Christina, Christine, Kristin, etc.

And those are my ideas for this family! What do you all think? What would you suggest for Justin Michael’s little sister?

Birth announcement: Alastair James Lewis!

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It’s a two-birth-announcement day y’all!! 😀 ❤

I did a private consultation for a couple recently who were very near their due date and struggling with middle names. They let me know their son has arrived, with the incredibly handsome and distinguished name of … Alastair James Lewis!

The mama writes,

“Alastair James Lewis S__ was born on March 3rd 🙂 I’ve included a picture of our little family on Easter … We are calling him Alastair. Sometimes we call him Ally. And sometimes we call him Parm because it looks like God sprinkled Parmesan cheese all over his little nose 🙂 “

How darling and fabulous is that?! I happen to know that his names were heavily influenced by his parents’ love of philosophy, and I think they did a tremendous job picking a great, meaningful name for their little guy (all I really did was assure them that the names they liked the best were a-ok!)

Congratulations to the proud parents, and happy birthday Baby Alastair!!

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Alastair James Lewis and his Mom and Dad

Birth announcement: Marianna Josephine!

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I posted a consultation for Jessica and her husband in December, and Jessica’s let me know her baby has arrived — a little girl named … Marianna Josephine!

She writes,

“Marianna Josephine was born today at 1:00 pm. She is 7 lbs, 9 oz and 19.5 inches. Mom and baby are both doing well. She is named for two of her great-grandmothers with St. Mary, St. Anne, and St. Josephine Bakhita as her patrons.

Thank you for doing our consultation!“

What a gorgeous name!! I love Marianna, such a gorgeous Marian mashup and with St. Anne in there too! Woo! And I’ve been loving St. Josephine Bakhita recently, what a great middle name.

Congratulations to Jessica and her hubs and big sibs Stephen, Paul, and Theresa, and happy birthday Baby Marianna!!

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Marianna Josephine

Backing into a patron saint

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This topic is one of my very favorites,  because I frequently come across families who chose names they love for their children but later regretted not having figured out a patron saint connected to their names, whether because they hadn’t really thought about the saint thing or because they’d had a later conversion/reversion/strengthening of their faith. I’ve seen some real suffering because of this! And I really really love being able to put a mama’s mind at ease. I wrote about the idea of “backing into a patron saint” in my CatholicMom article “Finding your patron saint (or being found),” but I wanted to share with you a real-life example from one of you wonderful readers. She writes,

“I’m wondering if you can help me with a “reverse” consultation. I’m Catholic, but didn’t necessarily prioritize choosing a Saint’s name for my first two children. My Catholic faith has grown a lot recently and I’m a little sad that I didn’t intentionally give my son a Saint’s name. My first born daughter’s [middle name is] Marie. Marie is my middle name, and while that was the main reason we gave it to her, I’m happy that it also honors Mary. My son’s name is Flynn Carlson. Flynn is my husband’s grandmother’s maiden name and Carlson is my maiden name. My husband … loves anything and everything Irish. When we found the name Flynn in a baby name book he fell in love and had to have it. I’m one of four girls, so my maiden name will not be carried on by anyone in my family, so I really wanted to give my maiden name as a middle name to my son.

I’d love for my son to have a Saint that is associated with his name, if possible. I know that a patron Saint doesn’t have to be associated with a name and I realize that ideally the qualities of a Saint should inspire parents to choose a name rather than trying to match a Saint to a name after the fact. St. Patrick is an obvious choice for a patron Saint, as Flynn is an Irish surname, but my husband’s middle name is Patrick and we may end up using that name as a middle name for a future son if we are so blessed. I’ve also always had a connection to St. Francis, and have always sung the prayer of St. Francis to my son to put him to sleep. I would have had a hard time naming a boy Francis, so even though I’m inspired by him, the name didn’t really stand a chance. Is it horrible that I’ve told myself that since Flynn and Francis both start with F, I can make a case that St. Francis is his patron Saint?

Anyway, I thought I’d just propose a challenge to you to see if you could come up with any Saints that might be associated with his name (Flynn Carlson). I think you have more expertise in this area than I do, and it would be fun to see what you come up with (if anything – I’m prepared if this is too strange of a request).”

It’s not a strange request at all, and I’m so delighted to offer my thoughts.

Flynn Carlson is SUCH a handsome combo!! I looked up Flynn first, which behindthename.com said means “descendant of Flann,” so I looked up Flann and it’s said to mean “red.” Another of my resources, Dictionary of Patron Saints’ Names, picks up on this meaning in offering a patron for Flynn—it points to St. Rufus, which means “red haired,” of which there are many, as well as a person in the New Testament.

But my favorite idea for a patron for Flynn Carlson is based on his middle name. It means “son of Carl/Charles,” and there are some great Saints by that name! My personal favoriteis St. John Paul II, whose given name at birth was Karol—the Polish form of Charles/Carl. But I think this mama (who has German ancestry) might love Bl. Karl, Emperor of Austria. I know Austria doesn’t equal Germany, but they’re so close I’m hoping it might hit her just right! I read about him just recently after Theresa mentioned in a comment  and love him—he lived recently enough that there’s a photo of him, which I actually posted on my Instagram recently. There’s also St. Charles Borromeo, who’s awesome, and a few others, some of whom are known as Carl/Carlo. If my maiden name was Carlson, I would be so excited to use it for a son, knowing that it would have both family and saintly connections!

I also really love the connection this mama has already made between Flynn and Francis — I think that’s lovely, especially since she’s always sung the Prayer of St. Francis to him. It’s kind of like St. Francis chose Flynn!

If any of you are struggling with a similar issue, please feel free to email me! Every little one should have a patron saint! ❤